Developing Goldilocks feel

Like most riders, I am on the long journey of finding perfect ‘feel’ in the rein contact. It is a hard thing to describe and therefore learn from someone else. It occurred to me that it is the same with developing feel as a massage therapist.

When other therapists work on each other to practice new techniques, the individual differences can be quite revealing. Some therapists are very gentle and quiet, some are annoyingly light with their touch, and others are direct or busy. The experienced and self-aware therapist makes you want to fall deep into a feeling of instant relaxation and security.

So I started thinking about where I am on that spectrum and how that translates through the reins to my horse’s mouth. I believe the aim of a horseman is to strive to be as subtle and calming with our hands as possible.

A way to test your feel is to place your hands on your horse (perhaps the neck), gently, lightly and slowly. Become aware of what is underneath your fingertips (pulsing, twitching, changes in tissue texture, temperature). Sink into the horse and drop your energy to the ground. Slow your breathing. Watch the horse’s reaction. He or she is the only judge of the quality of the feel. And then translate that feel into the rein contact.

(Erik Herbermann talks about a contact that is effective, but not too soft or too hard, which he calls the Goldilocks Principle.)
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